*This is not travel related. Just some random thoughts. I've been feeling down the past few weeks until this. Maybe you are too, maybe this can help you too, in a way at least. ;)
Remember when I said that nothing is permanent? Both the good and the bad?
Lately this mantra of mine hasn’t been working. A message and a forgotten reminder on my phone kind of caught me off guard, and threw me off balance. Again. I was reminded of the days when pain overpowered me. I was reminded of a side of me that I never knew existed.
Good thing our Cordillera trip was upcoming. I got distracted. I was comforted by the mountains, by moving, and traveling.
But as soon as I got back, everything seemed to be the same again. I guess the worst part is knowing that you have to deal with these emotions again, when you’ve been doing so good the past few months. And you ask why and what else do you have to do to get past everything. Because you want to, you really do.
Don’t you just hate it?
Then I realized that maybe it takes more time, and that sometimes you have no control of certain things. That maybe you just have to allow such emotions and face them. Don’t be too proud. And it’s okay to feel vulnerable again. No one’s rushing you to be completely okay.
It’s been a while since I had coffee by myself. I was waiting for a friend but she said she was going to be an hour late. My thoughts drifted off to events from exactly a year ago. And they weren’t such good memories, not at all. And then for some reason, I thought of this:
The thing with recurring sources of pain and anxiety is that we fail to look at the bigger picture. How, really, it's just a small portion of the whole thing. A heartbreak, a friend's betrayal, failures - they were just a part of it all. There were others - the changes, the moving, the travels, the adventures, the happiness felt with different people, in different places and in different times. We consider all of it and we realize that life has been great, really great.
To say that everything was okay again after this realization is a lie. But this thought helped a lot.
Let’s not focus on just one thing in life, especially the negative ones, especially those that we have no control of. When we can’t help but look back on our past, maybe we should look back more and see how better all things are now.
Posted on : May 11, 2013
Posted on : May 11, 2013
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NEW BLOG!
NEW BLOG!
Hey everyone! I'm moving to a new blog address : www.angelicacruzph.com
Same content but with some changes in design and layout. I'll still be keeping this one but will begin posting new stuff in the new blog. See you there!
You can still find me at the following:
Email : anggetravels.blog@gmail.com
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